The key word here is “God.”
God doesn’t give us more than we can handle. But Satan tries to. And life does. But God doesn’t. If there is something in our life that we cannot handle, it’s not from God.
Recently I had received prayer at church from a few elders in the faith regarding physical healing. My wife was with me, and one of the men who was praying for me had said the above phrase to us after praying: “God doesn’t give you more than you can handle.” I used to despise that statement because I was certain that it wasn’t true. After all, life had constantly given me challenges greater than my ability to handle it, sometimes burying me in them. Even after going through therapy and growing and maturing, life still threw garbage at me, including things I had never previously thought I would ever have to experience. So when this man stated that line this time around, the thought that came to me was to highlight the word “God” in that sentence. As in, it’s not that we don’t experience things we cannot handle, it’s that God Himself doesn’t put us through those things:
God doesn’t give us more than we can handle. But Satan tries to. And life does. But God doesn’t. If there is something in our life that we cannot handle, it’s not from God.
Recently I had received prayer at church from a few elders in the faith regarding physical healing. My wife was with me, and one of the men who was praying for me had said the above phrase to us after praying: “God doesn’t give you more than you can handle.” I used to despise that statement because I was certain that it wasn’t true. After all, life had constantly given me challenges greater than my ability to handle it, sometimes burying me in them. Even after going through therapy and growing and maturing, life still threw garbage at me, including things I had never previously thought I would ever have to experience. So when this man stated that line this time around, the thought that came to me was to highlight the word “God” in that sentence. As in, it’s not that we don’t experience things we cannot handle, it’s that God Himself doesn’t put us through those things:
“No temptation has overtaken you except such as is common to man; but God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will also make the way of escape, that you may be able to bear it.”I Corinthians 10:13 NKJV
For example, the living situation that I found myself stuck in for three years recently, I couldn’t handle. But even more recently, God also made it clear that He wasn’t the one who led me to move into that situation.
Speaking of rough living situations, 20 years ago (!!!!!) over the summer halfway through my time in college, I had a roommate situation that was utterly unbearable. (It was abusive.) I remember during the fallout staying overnight a couple of nights at a friend’s place in town (I would later move in with him after college for a year and a half), and venting to him about my roommate. He didn’t see it and even made a point to tell me that he had a positive view of him. I wasn’t happy hearing that, but his reaction was the least of my concerns at the time. A year or two later, however, even he confided in me that he had had some revelations of my college roommate’s character, and they were not good. Somehow I remember not being satisfied with his observations at the time, but I kept my mouth shut. However, just recently when this came back to mind, not long after receiving prayer and hearing, “God doesn’t give us more than we can handle,” it finally clicked. My friend who initially didn’t believe me regarding my roommate eventually realized for himself that this guy was trouble. The irony was that both men claimed to be believers (especially the abusive roommate). And maybe they each were.
But the point was, I am now seeing that this was yet another form of vindication. God allowed me to see many things He was doing to discipline the roommate, from allowing a massive hailstorm to completely total his car which had had a “fired up for Jesus” sticker on one of the side windows, to causing his then-girlfriend to break up with him (within the next couple of years, she married the next man she dated), to preventing him from advancing to the next stage in the wrestling tournament he was in (a complete surprise since it appeared that he had done well enough to advance), to some unexpected issues in his family, among other things.
As I look back at this, it was something God allowed to happen to me, but it was part of something much larger. In retrospect, I believe that He allowed this rooming situation to take place, knowing full well that it would fail spectacularly. As I continued to examine this time in my life in more recent months, there were multiple other things in play, several of which had nothing to do with this rooming situation. There were ties between myself and certain things, including certain individuals and certain types of individuals, that needed to be broken off. Given how stubborn I was (and still am) as a person, the only way for these ties to be broken involved letting me go through this, letting my resultant reactions take place, and letting that play out to the point of bringing me out of Minnesota and back to the Chicago area. As much as I wanted to grow up into adulthood in Minnesota, I now realize that it was not going to be good for me or my faith.
In my first couple years of my time at the Evanston Vineyard, which coincided with my first couple years back in Chicago, I was learning about prophetic prayer and healing prayer for the first time. Here, I started getting a few consistent images of things, much of which I didn’t understand at the time, but one of which I did: I saw an image of a woman’s face but without the nose and mouth. I immediately took it to mean that it was likely an image of what my future wife would look like. (And that turned out to be true. Of course, so as not to mislead the reader, my wife absolutely has a nose and a mouth! And good (and good-looking) ones, too!) The point being, among other things, my wife wasn’t going to be found in Minnesota; and it wasn’t guaranteed yet, but it was a good possibility that she would be found in the Chicago area. (And she was.)
So when I was recently being prayed for and was told that God doesn’t give us more than what we can handle, the same man also made a point to say that God brought me my wife specifically to be my wife, including on account of my need for physical healing. He had gone on to say that he could empathize with my wife due to the fact that his wife also has had a chronic condition that has caused her pain, and that as her husband he knows the same feelings of sorrow and helplessness at not being able to make it all go away except to pray and trust God to do what he himself cannot do. So after praying for me regarding my need, he then prayed for and blessed our marriage.
So it’s not that we don’t get thrown into situations that we cannot handle; it’s that, when it does happen, it’s not God who caused it. It’s a mistake that somehow I still have continued to make, even to this day. And while this post is a public declaration of awareness and agreement of the phrase “God doesn’t give us more than we can handle,” I’ve been around the block enough times to know that getting myself to successfully put this into practice will still take time. But even for that, there’s always a first step of faith that must be taken. So here goes.
“If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.”I John 1:9 NKJV
“And whatever things you ask in prayer, believing, you will receive.””Matthew 21:22 NKJV
“I shall not die, but live, And declare the works of the Lord.”Psalms 118:17 NKJV
By the way, as I was looking for an image to front this post, I came across this blog post on the same topic. Powerful! I want to relay it to you to encourage you as well.
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