This character has yet to appear by name in the “Faraway State of Mind” series posted so far (right now, he exists in an incomplete sketch for a 7th installment that’s just been sitting on my hard drive for roughly a year-and-a-half), but he has clear role: he is the father of the main character in these stories, Thomas More. Fun fact: ahead of writing the aforementioned sketch, I researched the real-life Thomas More’s parents’ names, and his father was indeed named John More. And although I didn’t name Thomas directly after the Lord Chancellor of England at around 1530, I named him after a pet of a childhood family friend of my mom’s, who, as I understand it, was named after him.
So basically, I’m grateful for my dad, in a lot of ways. But
it’s a lot more fun to treat him as a fictional character like I have been
doing with all the others (except for one, which I’ll get to later in this
series). So I’ll simply call him John for the remainder of this post. Which is
not to be confused with the aforementioned Dr. John K. Green (or the real-life
“Dr. John”), for that matter.
I didn’t have the greatest relationship with John for many
years. Although there were indeed circumstances that occurred that pre-empted
it, the bottom line was that I had believed a series of damaging lies about him
that prevented me from growing closer to him, let alone respecting him. It
wasn’t until I had moved in with him (really, the first time in my life that I
actually got to see him every day), and with the help of my support group, that I let
go of these damaging beliefs, to where we could finally really develop a
relationship. The remainder of our time living together allowed us to continue
to develop our relationship to new heights that we never really had the
opportunity to do earlier.
I’ll submit a list of things I’m thankful about for John
further down in the post, but I wanted to highlight one key area that I am
expressly grateful to get to share with him: us sharing our musical experiences
together. As an admission, I don’t freely perform musical compositions I’ve
written or recorded with a lot of people. He’s one of the rare exceptions. I
believe I’ve played in some form or another every significant (and complete)
original composition for him, and I’ve done so because I know that 1.) he will
most likely connect with the music, and 2.) he will provide feedback (both
affirmation and criticism) aimed to help the music be its best, especially if
revisions were needed in order to accomplish this goal. In the few times I have
shared compositions with others, I’ve gotten a few polite reactions as well as
some compliments and some ideas for feedback. But I’ve often felt like other
people’s reactions were lacking compared with his.
And he will turn the hearts of the fathers to the children, And the hearts of the children to their fathers, Malachi 4:6A, NKJV
Another area I’ve experienced John being a help is with general
troubleshooting, whether with cars, computers, or any else related to “how
things work.” Prior to God restoring our relationship, I really didn’t know
much about how to handle things in life outside of what school and university taught
me (which honestly, isn’t much when you think about it). And once God
challenged and subsequently restored my heart-attitude toward him, I was then
able to receive from him things that he could in fact teach me.
Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it. Proverbs 22:6, NKJV
My son, hear the instruction of your father, Proverbs 1:8A, NKJV
Now to list the things I’m grateful for: I’m grateful for John,
for how God has redeemed our relationship, for how (I believe) God has saved
him and given him new strength to face life and take it on that I don’t suspect
he had never known previously. I’m grateful for our times spent together, for
meals shared, music shared, and holidays and birthdays celebrated together.
While I will admit I still have some worries about him as he gets older, the
ways I’ve seen God intervene in his life gives me that hope that in the end, he
will be ok.
A father of the fatherless, a defender of widows, Is God in His holy habitation. God sets the solitary in families; He brings out those who are bound into prosperity; Psalm 68:5-6A, NKJV
As a father pities his children, So the Lord pities those who fear Him. Psalm 103:13, NKJV
