I created the character Caleb Redding (he appears in Faraway State of Mind installments #4, #5, and #6) with a definite muse in mind. (His real-life equivalent has all the same vowel sounds in both his first and last names.) But, because it doesn’t really serve the “Faraway State of Mind” story arc for me to create a new character for each friend, he represents every guy I was buddies with since moving back home, outside of Max and Ty where my friendships there developed further beyond “church and fellowship.”
However, I’ll begin with the man who most directly inspired Caleb’s
character. He was among the first friends I made at the Vineyard shortly after
I moved back home from Minnesota. I don’t exactly recall the moment we first
met, or the moment we first clicked as friends, but I do remember that it was
in a Bible study that my one friend who introduced me to the Vineyard, also invited
me to the Bible study he attended. The first few months our time of connection
was almost exclusively either at church or at that Bible study. As we got
further down the line, we started occasionally hanging out at events with other
friends, including local art fairs, Ultimate Frisbee games, movie nights, and larger
group dinners. We were also both part of another Bible study that focused on spiritual
transformation and personal growth.
Two years in to our friendship, Caleb moved halfway across the country (he’s from here originally and his family is still here) to further pursue things that God has been calling him. Ever since, he has generally been back in town twice a year for a week or two, and we have dinner at least once each visit (sometimes twice) to catch up, pray, and enjoy one another’s company.
One of the biggest marks Caleb has left on my life is simply
his infectious, God-given joy, and his propensity thereof. Other friends who
observed our friendship when it was first developing commented to me that my
hanging around with him helped me come out of my shell (I was in a really bad
place when I first began attending the Vineyard).
As such, I am grateful for him, for his infectious joy, for
our friendship, and the fact that, despite the distance and the infrequent
times of connection (we almost never communicate when he’s there and I’m here),
our friendship has remained strong when we do spend time together.
The light of the eyes rejoices
the heart, and a good report makes the bones healthy. Proverbs
15:30, NKJV
A merry heart does good, like
medicine, Proverbs
17:22A, NKJV
Two other guys that come to mind that I am also grateful
for, that Caleb’s character could also represent:
I also met both men in the same season that I met Caleb, within
the first few months of first attending the Vineyard. One of them I also met in
that same Bible study; the other I met through a gathering at Ty’s apartment
(at least, the one friend I’m thinking of that I consider the primary
inspiration for Ty). Through the years, through seasons of being in contact and
being out of contact, we’ve managed to maintain a connection and catch up every
now and then. With the first man, I’ve also had some praise-and-worship band
experiences, as he is a talented musician himself, both on Sunday mornings and
as part of a smaller band for another biweekly artists-themed Bible study and
support group. With the second man, we’ve bonded over our shared interests of
sports and traveling, and we’ve each opened up to each other about various
parts of our life, our dreams, hopes and aspirations, etc. I’ve also enjoyed
sharing various friendship circles with each man, the first with other
musicians and creative artists, and the second with other men pursuing a deeper
relationship with God and deeper spiritual healing. Also, for a brief time, the
second man and I were part of a church plant in the city, attending Sunday
services, Bible studies, and occasional ministry, outreach, and
community-building events.
I especially want to express my gratitude for these three
men, along with Max and Ty, because I’ve learned that true friends often are
hard to come by. As I reflect, I realize with dismay that I’ve likely spent
more time on this blog lamenting lost friendships (and many other lost
friendships not mentioned on this blog) more than giving God thanks for the
friendships that have endured. As an intro-extrovert, I’ve generally liked to
have the best of both worlds when it comes to friends and connections, with
both a tight inner circle of friends that I communicate and spend time with
regularly, as well as several outer layers of friends that I can see or connect
with every now and then.
Behold, how good and how pleasant it is for brethren to dwell together in unity! Psalm 133:1, NKJV
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